A Love-Hate Story.

“The sun shines hot and the wind blows cold.
It is Summer in the Light and Winter in the Shade.”
-Great Expectations.

Five Months Later,almost to the day,it’s finally over.
A Real Life Experience.whether good or bad depends on my mood when you ask me. But I’m pretty sure I’m going to miss it.
I have spent these five months,training at the Taj Mahal Palace,Mumbai. It’s a mandated semester of training as part of my graduation course, and quite honestly, an eye-opener.
It was different than anything I’ve ever done before. More taxing,more demanding,more challenging. Just More.
What can I say? What else would you expect from an undergrad student,interning at a five-star flagship property?

Life became a flurry of getting to work on time,getting home late more often than not, shifts,uniforms,guest satisfaction scores,hotel occupancy,banquet events and so much more.Things that had never crossed my mind. Days became work days and off days. Holidays became extra working hours. Weekends were synonymous with non-existence. But the friends I made there? They became family.

You don’t go into something like this expecting what will happen. Sure, you can guess. And ofcourse your seniors will tell you all about it. But nothing will even come close to preparing you. And you will never be able to explain the true ferocity of it. I suppose it’s just one of those things where those who’ve been there don’t need these words and those who haven’t..well, they’re probably convinced that I’m full of rubbish.

Yet, I feel so naive writing these words. Every one with a job understands what I’m saying. The long hours, the stress, the pressure, Mrs. Bennett’s nerves would have been shredded to pieces by the lack of compassion. The arguments, and the storming out, the fights and giving up on things because ‘you can’t deal with it right now.’

Adjusting to this new life you’ve been thrown into head-first is hard. There is just so much that you thought you had more time to figure out. And suddenly here you are, on a test-run of being an adult, and now you know why ‘Because.’ is a perfectly reasonable answer to any question.

It’s been barely a week since internship ended. And already I’m wallowing in nostalgia. Something I was sure wouldn’t happen.Real Life seems tough. I didn’t think I’d miss it. But I do.
I miss the hurry,the rush, the noise,the people. It was a familiar confusion, because for these few months ,it was all I knew. My world had reduced to The Taj, and getting there and back. Adjustment was not very kind. But once you know where you stand in the scheme of things, and you know the people and you’ve found your place with a few of them, I think it just all kinda falls into place.

I have met some wonderful people there. Both trainees and people who inspire me. I think it’s left me more capable and aware and appreciative,actually, of everything I thought was mine.

I read A Dairy of Colours recently.
This whole experience? Well, it started out a glossy bright green, which slowly became pale. It faded and for a awhile, it went black. Somehow, somewhere a change began within, and from the black burst forth a shower of purple. It covered everything in sight, the purple collapsed and all that was left, was a tempered midnight blue. It’s just like that.
Maybe I’ll share these colours with you,but for now I must leave. Because five months later, today I have absolutely nothing to do, and I’m going to enjoy it.

For now, I’m happy I get to be a little irresponsible again.

Wonderwall. Reflections of the socially awkward photographer.

Wonderwall: Someone you can’t stop thinking about,someone you are infatuated with.

Here I am, thinking of you and I don’t even know your name.
All I wanted was something forbidden.
And there you were, sitting on the footpath, in a black fitting Tshirt,
A lit cigarette casually held between the fingers.
Eyes met. We spoke.
My mind went a little blank.
It was those stupid cheek bones.
All I wanted was to take a picture of that moment.
And then some more.
Those light hazel eyes had me captivated.
But I didn’t know what to say.
So I walked away.
And now you’re on my mind.

I just wanted to be behind a lens with you on the other side.
Somehow the moment passed.
And now here I am,
trying to capture in words the image that I couldn’t.
I loathe this feeling of resignation.
This utter helplessness.
And now you’re on my mind.

There’s nothing I can do.
Fifteen minutes of acquaintance.
Four days of wishing it better spent.
You’re still on my mind.

One picture.
And you wouldn’t be on my mind.

Why are you still on my mind?